A Slightly Longer Introduction

When you go to college, it seems like for the first two weeks all you say is your name, your major and where you are from. I said Elizabeth, English and psychology, and Idaho. Many people correctly made the jump between 'English major' to 'writer'. Then they got this look in their eye, like my dog does when we try to give her eggs-which she hates. 

This is what I imagine people in general think when I say I am a writer:

You know lots of big words and like to use them. You are a grammar Nazi and love punctuation. You are addicted to caffeine. You possess superhuman abilities to type 5,000 words in a single sitting and enjoy it whereas I can barely scrape together a 2,000 word essay the night before it's due. You stay up really late typing for fun. You actually enjoy Jane Eyre, Edgar Allen Poe, and William Faulkner. 

Well. You get the idea. I should start off with what is outright not true about those (perceived) ideas.

I am not a big fan of any of the above authors. I know, I know. What girl doesn't like Pride and Prejudice? But for the love of God, Jane, I would love to introduce you to a period. You and commas are in desperate need of a divorce. I also do not like to write late, late at night because when I get too tired I start typing things like "and then Daniel called her stupid" which is fine except that I want Daniel to rage at her for forgetting their son at daycare. So 'stupid' doesn't quite cut it and it's time for me to go to bed. On a side note, one of my big tells for when I am too tired is when I start typing 'hesistitation.' I am aware that is not a word. I am also nowhere near as articulate in real life as I am on paper for two reasons. One: I have a backspace key when I write. Two: no one likes someone who says words like scintillating in real life unless they are being very ironic.

This is what it is really like, for me at least. I love Shakespeare and Tolstoy but I also love J.K. Rowling and John Green and Markus Zusak. Usually when I sit down to write a story (read: story NOT essay) I write around 2,000 words. The most I've written in a day is close to 7,000 but that was an exception. I am not superhuman: after said writing marathon, the tendons in my arms ached. (I am also now certain I will get carpal tunnel). I do love punctuation and grammar, because when they're there, no one notices them. I am currently involved in a lengthy love affair with coffee. 

I have a feeling this has gotten long-winded, so I will end there but I hope you get the idea. 

Note: I will not usually post twice in one day and I will try to make my posts much shorter than this in general. Please don't leave me alone, dear reader(s). If you go, it'll be like I am talking to myself.

Again.