Titles, otherwise known as the bane of my existence

This was inspired by a Buzzfeed thing (article? link? Whatever, I like thing) about things all writers understand. My favorite was a list of questions taken from Tumblr and the last one was 'HOW DO I TITLE?'

This spoke to my little writer soul because in case you didn't know I FUCKING HATE having to a pick a title.

It sucks. It's like trying to summarize your whole book into a few words and I struggle boiling it down into two lengthy paragraphs. 

For those of you who might be thinking, Oh please, it can be abstract or Just reference something important in the book or Stop being a whiny writer.

To the third person, bite me. Seriously. Then I'll have a reason to beat you senseless with my Shakespeare book.

The other two, okay, yes, when you put it like that it sounds easier. But it's just freaking not. Do you remember how I referred to Black & Gold as The Stupid Book for months because I didn't have a title for it yet? I have a whole document dedicated to possible titles and let me tell you, all of them suck. The one I picked isn't the greatest but it sucks the least. 

I thought I had it all figured out ahead of time for the second book when I named it Crown & Claw. Then, as I revised, I slowly realized that that is not a good title. 

And promptly pretended I didn't know that because having to think of a new title made my little writer soul very, very angry. 

Of course, I got over it and texted my boyfriend possible title combinations before settling on one I think I like. I'm not making any promises though. I might still change my mind. So for now, the second book is going to be called Throne & Fire.

It's not freaking over though. Because I still have to name the trilogy. The nice thing about titling a single book is it usually does contain some concrete themes and ideas and events to go on. But how do you take three books' worth of plot and characters and condense it into a single title?

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. 

That's not even the end, because I still have only half a title for the third book.

HOW DO I TITLE????